You will become what you deserve, my friend.
Now is the season, the time of the year towards the end of January and the beginning of February, that I get catapulted from a time of bith celebrations, into the furnace of grief – to go back through the smithing process again, for refinement.
But that’s grief, isn’t it? It comes when you least expect it. When you find a video you sent to your mum, of you in a pyjama set she bought you, tucked in a bed she kissed you goodnight in, cuddling the cat you both loved so much together.
The very first photo is my lovely mum in a blue ballgown, taken on the 14th of September, 2013. I would have been 13. The royal blue of Mum’s dress brightens and flaunts her clear blue eyes. A faint, hesitant smile has only aged 7 years with fondness and love. Her hair is short, and slightly messy. I love it, but I can imagine mum brushing her fingers through it only moments beforehand.
I would say I’m a very resilient person. Katie often says that nothing phases me, and my Mum would often say I take everything in my stride. I often say that as long as I have a good playlist going, I can do anything I need to or want to.
Quarantine lately had been getting the best of me.
I cannot wait to be Evee in my new life, and for Katie to be Katie in hers. I am ready for it now.