Sometimes, when I am alone with myself, I feel perfectly happy and complete. Other times, I feel alone. Like I'm a chicken scratch in dry mud when I'm meant to be parchment and expensive ink.
The thought of coming home to you is tantalisingly strong. I would come home in my grey blazer, soaked to the bone from cold autumnal rain. I'd be grumpy. I'd see your head with your glasses perched on the end of your nose, your mind far away between the comfortable pages of your book. I'd … Continue reading A Memory I Wish I Had
Death of a loved one is hard. Grief and mourning suck but both are necessary to heal. I say ‘heal’ only as a descriptor because healing is not a vacation or a pleasure cruise that has a beginning and an end. Healing is ongoing – a lifetime endeavor. The grief to mourning to healing continuum … Continue reading As Told By Lisa
"I don’t ask why me anymore. I believe everyone, everything I have been through, every person I have met, is in my life for a purpose. A reason, a season, and/or a lesson." Beautifully honest words from Lisa Mae. She writes an inspiring grief blog called The Road Back To Life; it is absolutely worth the … Continue reading As Told By Lisa Mae
The Grief Reality somehow stumbled, tripped and fell our way into a wider grief community, outside of wordpress. We could not be more grateful for the support, advice and joy Katie and I have felt across our social media platforms. One Instagram account that has given me a particular amount of support, is GoodGrief_UK. They … Continue reading “How Grief Changes Our Sense of Self”
I get stuck in my head a lot. I think and think and think, and sometimes the words I want to say just dry up in my mouth, and I keep everything inside. It’s not that I actively choose to not talk about it anymore, I just can’t express myself.
You were always there to tell me how proud you were and to tell me to never give up. I didn’t. I didn’t give up because you never gave up. You taught me to never give up, and we didn’t, did we?
I thought I’d never be able to endure this loss. But I suffered my biggest fear over the last 10 months and I’m still surviving it now. More than that, I finally feel as though I am in a position to start living again and putting myself back together.
On Facetime to both my boyfriend and my sister, Evee said to me “That’ll do pig, that’ll do” quoting the iconic final line from Babe, and I laughed through my tears. She was right, that’ll do. It’s over now, I can rest.
Today, I bleed. In the space of a year, everything has changed.