But this is my world. Those were the cards I had been dealt. I have been living without my Mum for 14 months now. I have been doing okay.
On the surface, this new life is wonderful and it suits you so well; you feel like you are meant to be here.
I'm made up for my little sister and best friend. So proud of how she has overcome every challenge thrown at her and still able to find the positive in every situation.
I cannot wait to be Evee in my new life, and for Katie to be Katie in hers. I am ready for it now.
Remember how Mum would always say to break things down, and to not look at the bigger picture. The bigger picture is scary, and so is a year. 365 days seems inconceivable right now, but you can manage one day at a time. Stay in bed if you have to. You don't have to leave the house, you just have to get through another day.
We are truly exhausted physically, but mentally, we are stronger and happier than ever.
I don’t feel fear like I used to. I’ve learnt that the only thing that you can actually count on in this life is, in fact, change. I don’t try and run away from it anymore; running away takes up too much energy anyway. It’s easier to face it straight on, embrace it, and jump.