As Told By Kelley

Grief often invades without warning. This was my experience several nights ago, as I drifted off to sleep. Suddenly, my mind was reliving the night my father-in-law, Bob, passed away. Every detail as clear as that night, over three years ago. The tears began to flow.

Why are these thoughts appearing now? Upcoming graduations. Bob was so proud of his grandkids. And graduations were a big deal! Not something he would ever miss. 

Ryan, the youngest, graduates high school in less than two weeks. Bob would be smiling, telling his friends about Ryan’s creative artwork and college plans. 

My favorite picture of Bob and Ryan.

Rachel, the youngest granddaughter, graduates college at the same time. Bob would certainly brag to his friends, β€œYou remember my granddaughter, Rachel? She already has a teaching job for next year!” 

Color coordinated! πŸ˜‰

His absence will be felt when each of them walks across the stage. I wish he was here. Such is the nature of grief.

This will not be a one-time experience. Future events will most assuredly bring similar emotions. Yet, we must continue to celebrate. Celebrate the present while remembering the past. Remembering the love of a Papa who would do absolutely anything for his grandkids. 

Our whole family is missing Papa. And it’s okay to say it out loud. Saying it out loud brings us closer together. It helps us remember how much he loved us and how much we love him.

~

Thank you so much to the wonderful Kelley, from Piano Girl, for this beautiful piece. It is so haunting for us to imagine the futures our people will not witness alongside us. Thank you again.

If you would like to submit a post for our page, feel free to email in at thegriefreality@outlook.com or you can head over to our contact us page.

11 thoughts on “As Told By Kelley

  1. πŸ’œ Thank YOU!!! for Sharing; off topic is this:

    “⚠️⚠️⚠️ WARNING; A TONGUE IN CHEEK WARNING TO ALL WHO HAVE A MOTHER ⚠️⚠️⚠️

    Pretty Long, Simple and Complex Like My Mom Who I AM Educating; there ARE NO!!! Apologies to AnyOne Who Perceives Offence, THIS IS MY TRUTH!!! for NOW!!! yet May Change if I AM Convinced by SomeOne Smarter than Me Emotionally; it’s Crystal Clear Clarity that it’s Intellectual Idiocy that just PISSES ME OFF!!! and I End Up with Pushing Buttons and Pulling Triggers that DON’T NEED!!! To Be There if MMHI (Multiple Mental Health Issues) from Our Conditioned, Parental UpBringing that We Admit, Acknowledge and Address ARE Totally TERMINATED!!! by Being Strangled with Out Umbilical Cords and Eventually ELIMINATED!!!…ergo; ‘Mommy Dearest’ ~ Movie

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    ON CHOICE, DECISION, DESTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, COMPLIMENTS, COMPLAINTS AND HAPPY FUCKING MOTHERS DAY

    πŸ’œ Simple and Complex, YOU!!! Got it Right Control Freaking Mothers as YOU!!! ALWAYS!!! Do; simple is The Foundation for Complexity as YOU!!! Well Know…say, for example with Cells, Atoms, Cooking Ingredients et al; so Simplicity Says No Wrong Order and meanwhile ALL Our Conditioned Complexity Demands that We ARE in ORDER!!! ORDER!!! ORDER!!! and Simplicity Simply Smiles Looking On Like a Child until Beaten or Other Abuse for “BEING CHEEKY!!!”

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    ON SUCCEEDING

    πŸ’œ Success is Neither Big Nor Small it simply is Success; if YOU!!! THINK!!! YOU!!! ARE Very Successful then YOU!!! ARE a Success…there’s NOTHING!!! Worse than CHOOSING!!! Pursuing Other Peoples Idea of Success especially Mom when YOU!!! KNOW!!! What Success Means To YOU!!! and Mothers Deny It with “I AM so Very Disappointed in YOU!!! I Expected So Much More from YOU!!! and YOUR FATHER!!!.”…a Definite No, No, No is this; repeating this ad nauseum “YOU!!! SHOULD!!!…” when it’s so Much Better to Suggest then Back Off…as Rebukes and Approval ARE Imposters (‘If’ ~ Poem by Rudyard Kipling) where a Person is Rebuking or Approving ThemSelves; ergo, ONLY YOU!!! ARE Able To Approve or Rebuke YOURSELF!!! there is NoOne Else for YOU!!! To Be Treated By Thus if YOU!!! Desire Company

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    ON BEING HERE AND IN THE FUCKING MOMENT!!! MOMMY

    πŸ’š WhereEver YOU!!! ARE NOW!!! is Where YOU!!! ARE Supposed To Be Due to YOUR!!! Numerous CHOICES!!! and DECISIONS!!! however much YOU!!! May Perceive that it was ALL Out of YOUR!!! Control; it’s Crystal Clear Clarity that We CHOOSE!!! Our Parental Controllers and if YOU!!! CHOOSE!!! to Research http://www.ericberne.com YOU!!! WILL!!! Understand The Reason WHY!!! If YOU!!! ARE Able To Perceive it with YOUR!!! Six Plus Senses then IT IS REAL!!! WhatEver Parents and Other Authority TOLD YOU!!! especially The Whole Private and Public Thingy; like Impotent Penises and Dried Out Vaginas

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    ON THE MADNESS, MALEVOLENT, MALE POWER OF RELIGION

    ❀ My Devoutly Religious Mother locked me in to a Religious Prison like in ‘Carrie’ the Movie based on the book ‘Fire Starter’ by Stephen King starring Sissy Spacek; it wasn’t until I STOPPED!!! Rattling The Bars of My Religious Jail and Ironically Dropped to My Knees that I Saw My Mother had Thrown The Key to My Cell through the bars; essentially saying:

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    β—‡ “Sorry, please now Free YOURSELF!!! from Me and My Religious Beliefs which ARE NOT!!! for YOU!!! Worship YOURSELF!!! and Goddess that is ALL, Goodbye and SEE (Soulful Emotional Energy) YOU!!! Soon Son.”

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    ON COMMERCIALISATION VS CREATIVENESS

    πŸ’œ One of The Major MisConceptions about Creativity is that it NEEDS!!! Mastery which is the Worst Fucking BullShit (WFB) I Have Ever Heard Expressed; sure a Mathematician does Have To Master Numbers as Do Accountants and Legal Folk NEED!!! to Master LAW!!! while Doctors Mastering Medicine et al…but ALL of Us Creatives ARE Already Masters of Our Craft, Make-It-Up-As-We-Go-Along, along with Our Own, Unique, Individual, Solo, Personal, Artistic, Creative PathWays; with Careful, Contrary Collaboration from Linear Time-To-Time…its NEVER!!! The Substance; it’s ALWAYS!!! The Mood so Don’t Let Parental Controllers Get YOU!!! Down just Laugh…because The Buggers Hate That; because They Have FORGOTTEN!!! How to LAUGH!!!

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    …and FINALLY!!! if YOU!!! Have Got This Far and Wanna Carry On Reading This Diatribe…

    ON MOTHERLY DEMISE; HYPOCRITES STOP!!! READING HERE TO AVOID GETTING UPSET

    πŸ’œ So, in Summary, about ‘Mothers’ especially Stepford Wives, all that Fake, False, Fraudulent Kissing and Caring Conning Compliments; it’s Crystal Clear Clarity that I Did NOT!!! Wish to CHOOSE!!! to be Born in to The Family of a Complaining Mom who Does Work Hard but is a Fucking Furious Female who Wonders what SHE!!! Has Done, is Doing, Going To Do and so Totally FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD!!! while Drifting Off in to Dotty Old Age, Dying a Miserable Death that EveryOne Celebrates by Quietly PRETENDING!!! To Mourn with a Quiet THOUGHT!!! of ‘Thank fuck she’s gone.’

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™…

    ON SUCCESS CLASS 101 AND RAINBOWS

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    β™‘ Only YOU!!! Decide what Successful Means to YOU!!!
    ♀ How YOU!!! Succeed is Entirely Up to YOU!!!
    ♧ Clubbing – If Others Belittle YOUR!!! Successes YOU!!! ARE PERFECTLY ENTITLED!!! and Welcome to Tell THEM!!! to VERY KINDLY FUCK OFF!!! – Clubbing

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    …β—‡β—‡β—‡…

    ON HAIKU

    β™‘ Hurting and Healing

    Pain is No Big Deal
    Let Pain Rest
    Let Pain Heal

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …β™‘β™‘β™‘…

    ON HAIKU

    β—‡ Parenting

    If I Think I is Mad
    It is because of
    My Mom and Dad

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …β—‡β—‡β—‡…

    ON HAIKU

    ♀ Painful

    WithOut Pain
    There is NO!!! Gain
    Sunshine and Rain

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …♀♀♀…

    ON RESTING, RECOVERY, REFRESHING, RESETTING, RELEARNING AND RENEWING

    β™‘ If We SEEK!!! Solutions rather than FOCUSSING!!! On Illusory PROBLEMS!!! Amazing Things Happen; it’s OK To Rest, actually it’s ESSENTIAL!!! to Rest EveryOne, that’s The Only Way We Heal by AdmittingΒ  Acknowledging and Addressing Our MMHI (Multiple Mental Health Issues) thereby Remaining Happily IMMORTAL!!!

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    …β™‘β™‘β™‘…

    ON SELF LOVE

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    β—‡ “I AM Me; if YOU!!! Don’t Like Me then YOU!!! ARE Very Welcome to KINDLY FUCK OFF!!!” ~ Anon, http://www.ericberne.com

    nisi mortuus nec neque nolite vicit 🀭🀫🀐

    β—‡ – Diamond Hard – β—‡

    …β—‡β—‡β—‡…”

  2. I have no words, I have seen many blogs on positivity, love and senseless things. But you guys are doing something that surround the ultimately reality, we’ve been living life as if it is a gift, but we have to pay the price for it. I think this conversation about grief is something that the mainstream won’t follow, but all you have done is given shoulders to ones who need it, hugs and love, and that is what makes you true daughters who your mother would be proud of. These are hard times and you are angels. Stay strong and keep going.

    1. Comments like these make it all worth it. Thank you so much for your comment, for your unconditional support.
      It is our honour to hold space for you all to share your grief and ultimately, to know you are not alone.
      Thank you for brightening our days 🀍

  3. God bless Kelly and her family and your my dears. Life and death are two sides of the same coin- part and parcel of duality.
    Yes grief can come very unexpectedly and can be devastating.

    Love and blessings

  4. Thank you for sharing!!… maybe a bit sad in the beginning, but the heart will mend knowing they haven’t left as they occupy the heart ant their spirit is with us always!!… πŸ™‚

    [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpryOCV1tzw%5D

    Until we meet again…
    May your day be touched
    by a bit of Irish luck,
    Brightened by a song
    in your heart,
    And warmed by the smiles
    of people you love.
    (Irish Saying)

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