It sometimes daunts me to think that I write my thoughts so vocally on this platform. Imagine telling the world all your weaknesses that anyone can come to. This blog really represents the inner workings of parts of me.
Katie spoke a lot about gratitude in this wonderful post. I love the simplicity of her post and her nature of gently peeling back defences to let light into a readers mind.
There is a lot to be grateful for, and one thing I am spectacularly grateful for this month, is my friend. For the sake of this, we shall call her Mills.
We met when we were 14 at a summer school, and have always had an online friendship as we live miles away. When we went into lockdown, we still sent each other videos, and I remember feeling grateful for this one aspect of my life that had not changed. She flew out to see me when I lived in Granada in 2019, we went on a road trip (pre-corona), she repeatedly came down to Devon to see me, and really, she’s always been there.
She loved my Mum, and she still talks to me about her memories of Mum. She’s one of the few people who make my Mum real. It’s a wonderful aspect of her that I can’t take for granted. After my Mum passed away, she would let me stay with her, we’d party, we’d go for breakfasts and we would talk about random things over cups of teas.
Since December we both had a bit of a mental health setback, and didn’t talk to each other as much. Yet, when we reconnected she mentioned she had still thought of me every day, as I had her, and she even told me she had thought of my Mum when she bought a new coat for herself. The most touching thing she told me was that she had read all the posts, every post I had written whilst we weren’t able to talk.
Now, granted, we only stopped talking for about a month, but to know that she was still supporting me from the sidelines, when I couldn’t even see, means the world to me. To know that we were there for each other, without either of us really realising it, has made me feel a rush of gratitude that I can’t even articulate fully.
Katie always tells me that friends are like stars: you don’t always realise they are there, but they are always shining.
A cringe quote, but eh, it’s worth the second hand embarrassment.
Thank you, thank you so much.