Belgian Bun

One of my favourite memories of Mum, is when she would come back from a food shop, or a bakery with a brown paper bag, and a big smile. Even if we had argued, she would still bring me some sort of baked good. Chocolate eclairs, cinnamon buns, sausage rolls.

My favourite was a Belgian bun.

She would come back, I’d help her unpack the car, and before we did the shopping, we’d put the kettle on. Together we would sit, drink tea and eat our snack. She wouldn’t get herself a treat; but she’d almost always ask for a bite of mine (much to my greedy annoyance). It wasn’t much, but I treasure it now.

I haven’t had a Belgian bun since, until today.

There is a lot of simple joy to be had in the world, but when we suffer so much pain, indirectly, we stop ourselves from enjoying it. Whether we realize it or not.

I wrote a poem once about the first time I felt joy after my mum died. I was conflicted; I didn’t even know what to name the emotion. It felt wrong, but it felt healing. Eventually I settled into the emotion and called her ‘joy’.

Joy can be painful, too. That doesn’t mean we don’t deserve to enjoy all the little things. We can try to relish the pain it brings; pore over that memory. Remember every feeling and sensation. But welcome the new memory that will come with it.

Time is not still. Your feelings are not still, and they shouldn’t be. When you’re ready; taste those familiar foods enriched with memory. Listen to the treasured albums you haven’t listened to in a long time.

I will enjoy my Belgian Bun now.

Evee x

31 thoughts on “Belgian Bun

  1. Cindy Georgakas – I’ve been in the field of health and wellness for thirty plus years. It is my passion and life work. I’m a Life Coach, certified through Dr. Cherie Carter Scott PHD (Mother of Life Coaching), a Certified California Massage Therapist, (CAMTC) specializing in Craniosacral Therapy, Thai, Deep Tissue, Sports. Pre postnatal etc. I am also a Reiki Master, a Certified Personal Trainer, and a Certified Yoga Teacher and writer. I love starting my day in meditation, yoga and Tai Chi and Qui gong, hiking with my husband, furry legged kids, and my kids (when I can grab them); and hanging with my cats.
    Cindy Georgakas says:

    How happy is your mum, knowing you can feel joy and the memory of a belgian bun. I best she’s smiling right now

  2. Cheryl, Gulf Coast Poet – Gulf Coast of Florida – A retired teacher, I live with my significant other on the Gulf Coast of Florida. I enjoy the beach, walking outdoors, movies, and reading. Hanging Out with Wild Animals is a book series of photos and poems about my encounters with Florida animals. Wonders is a book of poems inspired by the men I have known and loved. Life in Inspiring Places is a book of photos and poems about the places rich in history and natural beauty that I have called home. Excerpts from the books and additional poems can be found on my website. Cheryl Batavia
    gulfcoastpoet@gmail.com says:

    Evee, enjoy your memories of good times with your mom. I find it helpful to also remember good advice and to follow the good examples of those I have lost. Take care. Cheryl

  3. clairei47 – My name is Claire. I am a mum, a wife and I work for the NHS. For as long as I can remember I have drank alcohol and my relationship with it has become increasingly complex over recent years. I’m 47 and I want to be physically and mentally healthy. I want to be present in my life and enjoy the journey, not drown it out with wine and hangovers. I have had anxiety and depression and I am still working hard to keep them at bay. I am hoping that not having alcohol will help me beat them. I have decided to detail how things progress via this blog. I know nothing about blogging but I think support from others is essential. Maybe one day I can help someone with my story. I started my sober journey on 17th November 2019; long may it continue.
    clairei47 says:

    It is so important that you remember and cherish those memories, no matter how hard that can be. It’s what she would want. I often hope my boys remember the little routines and habits we have and do. It’s a lovely thought that they might look back one day and remember them. Claire xx

      1. clairei47 – My name is Claire. I am a mum, a wife and I work for the NHS. For as long as I can remember I have drank alcohol and my relationship with it has become increasingly complex over recent years. I’m 47 and I want to be physically and mentally healthy. I want to be present in my life and enjoy the journey, not drown it out with wine and hangovers. I have had anxiety and depression and I am still working hard to keep them at bay. I am hoping that not having alcohol will help me beat them. I have decided to detail how things progress via this blog. I know nothing about blogging but I think support from others is essential. Maybe one day I can help someone with my story. I started my sober journey on 17th November 2019; long may it continue.
        clairei47 says:

        I agree x

  4. I also love Belgian buns. A very nice way to enjoy fo d memories.

  5. Beautifully written. My mother was a great cook. Just eating fried chicken brings back such great memories. I still haven’t found any as good as hers. Thank you for sharing. Stay safe.

  6. M. Zeeshan Horani – Karachi, Pakistan – “The best marketing doesn’t feel like marketing.” "Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great." Hey Shouters! Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Zeeshan Horani or you can call me a marketing enthusiast! Holding the marketing degree is just a formality because actually marketing is in my DNA I served diverse industries like, Telecom, Fashion, & Textile. Worked in multinationals like, Nokia, Clarins & Gul Ahmed. Sharing my thoughts is my weakness and strength at the same time. And the platform is Blogging, Guest Speaking & Teaching too. Being a marketing geek, I love to travel, meet people, experiment & experience out of the box If you have same taste then please follow me on: hafix.zeeshan@gmail.com https://www.facebook.com/urbosum https://twitter.com/HafizMZeeshan https://hafizzeeshan.tumblr.com/
    M. Zeeshan Horani says:

    Yummilicious

  7. Kally – Singapore and Malaysia – I am a proud owner and writer of MiddleMe.net and I want tp help people to better themselves in their career. After all, we spend at least 40 hours a week at our job.
    Kally says:

    This make me so hungry…

  8. H.R Phoenix, Author – H.R Phoenix is the owner and creator of Penable. She likes to inspire people to write and is an Author of a poetry book and the Penable magazine 2020. When she's not working on a short story or writing awesome Penable Posts, she enjoys spending time with her two cute kittens..
    H.R Phoenix, Author says:

    Nice! Thank you for sharing such a wonderful memory… Makes me want a belgian bun as well….

    Btw, I love your blog! I’ll be following

      1. H.R Phoenix, Author – H.R Phoenix is the owner and creator of Penable. She likes to inspire people to write and is an Author of a poetry book and the Penable magazine 2020. When she's not working on a short story or writing awesome Penable Posts, she enjoys spending time with her two cute kittens..
        H.R Phoenix, Author says:

        Thank you so much!

  9. Lost mum 4 years ago in the 23rd. Those memories just bring so many happy feelings. It’s often those seemingly little memories which are the best. My mum with her cream buns or maybe strawberry tarts. xxxx

  10. windsofchange18 – I am a stay at home mom of two. I love my morning coffee and my afternoon tea. I love spending time with my family. In my spare time I love to read and especially write. I hope what I share on here all of you will enjoy.
    windsofchange18 says:

    That looks so delicious

      1. windsofchange18 – I am a stay at home mom of two. I love my morning coffee and my afternoon tea. I love spending time with my family. In my spare time I love to read and especially write. I hope what I share on here all of you will enjoy.
        windsofchange18 says:

  11. Krisna – Hi! I’m Krisna. I write about my experiences as a first-time mom and tips that I learn along the way in hopes of inspiring other new moms to love and enjoy their journey into motherhood.
    Krisna says:

    That looks really yummy. Hope you’re feeling better!

  12. dysfunctionalandmagicallife – My name is Lauren. I have four children 19,15,12 and 1! I love telling stories of my crazy family life as i find it generally makes people feel better about their own ! I like to have open and honest conversations and i absolutely love books.
    dysfunctionalandmagicallife says:

    I resonated so much with this . Thank you my mum loved cake and whenever there is a cake in our house my children k is to get their nana’s mismatching cake plates – to us they are our priceless possessions xxx

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