I Don’t Fit Into That Box Anymore

While you are grieving, or at a particularly vulnerable period of your life, you may feel as though you belong in a box clearly labelled “FRAGILE”. Wrap yourself up in “handle with care” tape, swaddle yourself safely in bubble wrap.

Find comfort there and take all the time in the world. Allow yourself to truly feel it.

But no matter how permanent and all encompassing this fragility and vulnerability may seem, remember, it’s only temporary.

Just know that this period of your life doesn’t define you. You aren’t your grief. You aren’t what happens to you in this life, you are how you deal it. You won’t always feel so small. You are so strong and one day you will believe it again.

One day, you’ll realise that you’ve outgrown this “FRAGILE” box that you used to find so much comfort in. One day, you’ll realise that it’s no longer big enough to accommodate your needs. Step outside and let it go. Allow yourself the space to grow. Surround yourself with people that embrace this feeling and grow with you. Learn to walk alongside people rather than walk behind them.

And one day, you’ll realise you shouldn’t be placed into a box at all.


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27 thoughts on “I Don’t Fit Into That Box Anymore

  1. Marty – I am 69 now and help others with chronic pain, PTSD, CPTSD, agoraphobia, depression and anxiety. My journey to live peacefully and happily while having chronic pain and CPTSD My life was consumed with pain extreme fear and a nervous system that exploded. I suffered as a victim for a while trying to find a way out. The lessons learned and that experience have guided me to help others. My goal is to support others on their journey with directions and encouragement. My path has seen many online in discussion boards that never heal.. Coping mechanisms, disassociation, anger confuse most PTSDers to quit trying. Avoidance can lead to agoraphobia. A therapist once told me that you could go down to far and never get back. That is always in my head. My journey has lead me to a life now void of any symptoms or very little. My actions and life are normal again to the eyes of most people. My path has made me appreciate my trauma and abuse as training for this challenge. I have accepted and embraced my abuse for what it is and see all the benefits I gained from the experience. My willpower, determination and discipline are well developed and suited perfectly to live freely with chronic pain and CPTSD. I am not a therapist but more of a coach for you. Therapists are great and a good one is key. However you only visit a therapist maybe once a week. That is one hour a week or maybe every two weeks. PTSD is much more resilient and powerful to be cured with that amount of effort. I can help fill in those others times when you are alone. You will heal yourself from inside. Timing is up to you.
    Marty says:

    Grieving is a process a healthy person understands and gives time for.

    Fragile is a judgment

    We can grieve without the fragile moniker I believe

    Sounds like you are progressing and growing

      1. Pleasure. Your blog gives me hope, for my daughter. Only Time can “heal”… Take care of yourselves.

  2. Frank LaManna – Allentown, Pennsylvania – I'm an aspiring teacher, but a writer at heart. I love football, Atlantis, and the Arts. Table Seven is my piece of the web, and I write about things I like, things I dislike, and things I think people should know about.
    Frank LaManna says:

    Very nice.

      1. Great to hear that, take care of number one and the rest will come. Thank you for reading our posts and thank you for commenting. Everyone’s contributions are my favourite thing about running this blog

      2. I am very new to blogging, and loving every minute of it. It has been cathartic for me and the best therapy I could ever have begun. Thank you so much for reading and the follow.

      3. I’m really happy to hear that’s it’s had such a positive impact on you. It’s definitely helped Evee and I over the the last 9 months and I love being part of this community 🙂

    1. Hi! How are you? I am just looking back through old comments and came across your one again. I wanted to tell you that my sister and I were talking about this post the other day, and this particular feeling. We concluded that people shouldn’t be put into boxes at all. They should be put into plant pots, they should be watered and encouraged to grow! I am going to write a post about this soon, I’ll send it to you once it’s up :). I hope you are keeping well and that you and your family are safe in this time. Take care 🙂

      Katie x

  3. Scherezade Ozwulo – I am Scherezade an aspiring writer who is using this outlet to create a discipline. I am also a Christian with questions and want to create a space where others who have questions can discuss in an open forum.
    Scherezade Ozwulo says:

    We are supposed to change how else do we grow? Is what I say when someone says “you seem different” or “you’ve changed”. By not changing, you come complacent in that “box”, and that’s when you become not your happiest.

  4. Yes that is such a good way of looking at it. We all get put in our own constraints box. It’s up to us to our grow it and break out. The secret I guess is to avoid falling into another box.

  5. Fantastic blog. I find those around me are quick to put me in that box. However I know that it is only I who can climb out of the box and show them that we do manage to move forward.

  6. kevin cooper – I’ve always had a passion for books and music, and I’ve benefited from this kind of escapism for as long as I can remember. I love to read a wide variety of genres which probably accounts for the diversity in my own published works and the music releases.
    kevin cooper says:

    Change is good! 😀

  7. Chaya The Wisdomkeeper – I have learned over the years, that we have the ability to heal ourselves. We can create our illness. However, we can also create our wellness. The time is now. I have studied over 40 years in the area of natural and alternative healing. After reading several books on various types of healing, I felt I wanted to share this wealth of wisdom. Many of these books are from various cultures and philosophies. I enjoy comparing and finding differences in all areas. My intention of this blog is to help one decipher the information and modalities. To provide an informative guide through your own journey to heal yourself. There are so many ways of doing the same thing. There are so many ideas that have the same concept but are called something different. If I learned anything, I have learned that we have to heal ourselves at every level...Mind, Body, and Spirit. Disclaimer Information on this website is based on my training and research from the internet, books, articles, and studies and/or companies selling crystals, metaphysical tools, and herbs online. Statements on this website have not necessarily been evaluated and should not be considered as medical advice. Any products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any illness or disease. for diagnosis or treatment consult your physician. Many find that when they go back to doctor their medicine and ailments are reduced. Use herbs in moderation and watch for allergic reactions. If you are taking any other medication, are suffering from a medical condition and/or are at all concerned about any of the advice or ingredients consult your doctor before taking the herbs. If you are pregnant, breastfeeding or have/had breast cancer do not take any of the herbs (as many affect hormone balance, uterine contractions and are estrogenic).
    The Wisdomkeeper says:

    Thank you for this blog. Fitting into the mold everyone wants is not easy, yet when you grieve many don’t understand you. This holiday season, I’m not anticipating being depressed either. Both my son’s Angel Anniversary is at holiday time. I’m making plans. ones I know I can handle. One son’s first anniversary is on Jan 1. I found with the other son, the anticipation of the date is worst than the date. His has been 6 years. I’m working on breaking out of my own box.

  8. The Trainer RN Hood River – United States – I want to “help” you have fun and enjoy life. Most important is to assist you in living a wonderful and relatively “pain free” life! Trust me, you don’t want to spend half your life in doctors offices and hospital beds! The Trainer RN* 15 3rd st Hood River Oregon 97031 541-490-8717 rixterstufff@yahoo.com
    The Trainer RN Hood River says:


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